The tormented soul of an ambitious boy June 18, 2007

Filed under: Miscellanuous — saifulrizan @ 3:26 am

Are we really that rich when we drive imported cars, living in mansion, wearing designer clothes and having lunch at Starbucks?

Are we really that poor if we drive a used local production car, buying t shirt from pasar malam, living in a wooden house and work as a labor?

I’ve been thinking about that lately. My job sometimes gives satisfaction. Well, if something’s good happens, ultimate satisfaction. Sometimes it’s a miserable headache, too much to handle and too much to settle. Since the last couple of months, I hardly spent my night time at home, or with friends like I used to. I spent more time in the office, and making money.

It made me realized I’m going nowhere near wealth. Well, if you’re wondering why, I am not speaking in terms of cash and assets wealth, but my social life and my health. What’s better than spending dinner with families, watching TV with them, having teh tarik with friends, go to cinema, and all that things I can do before. My commitment took that kind of life away from me.

Sometimes I wonder if a farmer is better than me. Yeah, woke up early in the morning might be hard for me, but for them, it’s an obligation. But they have nothing to complaint; they walk their kids to school, lunch at home with family and any other thing they can do without considering job etiquette and professionalism. I had to set my alarm pretty loud so I can wake up for Subuh prayer, but get back to sleep afterwards. I envy anyone that can stay up after that and start their routine like any other day. Even my late grandpa told me, “lalat pun bangun awal cari makan”. Oh, how much I missed my late grandpa. I was there, sitting next to him when he breathes for the last time, giving me last advice so I can become someone someday.

I observed other peoples life; my friend, strangers, entrepreneurs, etc. I tried to find what will make them happy. Driving the latest BMW car would not make someone wealth, unless they paid cash for it. Some people have to work really hard to pay for their home, cars, furniture, kids school expenses, travels and the entire thing we want to enjoy. I know to pay for all those things, some have to work hard, spend over time in the office till late night, and losing valuable family times. I don’t want to see myself in the future like that, but I need a good life. Good life doesn’t come in free.

I want to drive high-end production car, I have to throw in big amount of money or paying large amount of monthly installment.

I want a security in life; I have to insure myself with life insurance, general insurance (for house) and other financial aid. It’s not free.

I want to have a good food, but I can’t cook that good, so I go to restaurant or warung instead of learning to cook so I can save time and get back to work to complete some job commitment.

I know we live in a fast pace-changing life; it’s challenging and demanding. If you can’t go with the flow, we are going nowhere but here. All of us have confidence, abilities, specialties and knowledge, but the difference is the level in each of the criteria. I might have the abilities, but lack of confidence or vice versa.

Life keep going, disregard our decision on making changes, because time don’t wait for anyone, it keep running from us we have to work hard catching up with time. And because of that, we lose valuable moments with family and friends. If things keep going like this, will there be a change in the way we keep our relationship with our families without working to hard to accommodate their needs financially?

I don’t want to be a workaholic, that’s for sure.


6 Responses to “The tormented soul of an ambitious boy”

  1. cindy Says:

    That’s the problem most people face with.. no matter what you do, where you are, there’s always the feeling of you’re not doing it enough in order to have a comfortable life. 😦

    Hey, anyway, here’s an out of topic question. Can I ask for some help ar? In terms of advice la..

    I’m thinking of buying a good camera.. not too high end one la but slightly lower than the expensive DSLR. 😀 Should I go for Canon or Nikon? Or Sony?

    Do you happen to know a place where I can find reviews on camera only? 😀

    Thank you in advanced ar.. 😀

  2. SR215 Says:

    Life satisfaction might be impossible to some people, including me. So, yeah, I agree with you.

    OOT :

    Try this link.

    THey discussed the three camera you asked, so maybe you can start from there.

    But I think Nikon is the cheapest among all you queried. 🙂

  3. cindy Says:

    Hmm.. okay thanks! 😀

  4. maslight Says:

    hmm…everyone wants to improve their life. vice versa, ppl will never be satisfied to wut they haf. it’s also influences from ur surrounding. some ppl tend to feel motivated or maybe challenged with other’s success. hmm, i feel like dat sometimes.

    anyways, hopes everything work out fine for u, and dun work too much ler, not gewd for health XD spend more time with ur family *cheers XD

  5. Anonymous Says:

    Yup… i dig u. And i guess you too will realise your health n sanity is at stake when you go deeper into your work.

    all about balancing i guess (or getting out of the rat race if u read kiyosaki’s book).


    – Julian Sabah

  6. SR215 Says:

    mas : Thanks. And I tihink since I start my to-do-list pasted on the wall, I got things sorted. I’m trying to avoid doing things more than the priod I’ve allocated. Hopefully things will be better.

    Julian : Yes, and that’s why I need to do more to get my life back. Work might be the first thing, because I need income to cover my expenses, but then I believe when we can balance those things, life will get easier. RESPECT!

    *I read the Rich Dad Poor Dad book, but only half.. because no time to read. Hahahhaha

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